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　Gossip　Girl　

You　Know　You　Love　Me　

All　I　Want　Is　Everything　

Because　I？m　Worth　It　

bbonds　with　j　over　breast　size　

？Just　a　few　fries　and　some　ketchup；　please；？　Jenny　Humphrey　told　Irene；　the　
one…hundred…year…old　bearded　lunch　lady　behind　the　counter　in　the　basement　cafeteria　of　the　
Constance　Billard　School　for　Girls。　？Just　afew　；？　Jenny　repeated。　Today　was　the　first　day　of　peer　
group；　and　Jenny　didn？t　want　her　senior　peer　group　leaders　to　think　she　was　a　total　pig。　

Peer　group　was　a　new　program　the　school　was　trying　out。　Every　Monday　at　lunchtime　the　
freshman　girls　were　to　meet　in　groups　of　five　with　two　senior　girls　to　discuss　peer　pressure；　body　
image；　boys；　sex；　drugs；　alcohol；　and　any　other　issues　that　might　be　bothering　the　freshman　girls　
or　that　the　two　senior　peer　group　leaders　deemed　important　enough　to　talk　about。　The　idea　was　
that　if　the　older　girls　shared　their　experiences　with　the　younger　girls　and　started　a　sympathetic　
dialogue；　the　younger　girls　would　make　informed　decisions　instead　of　stupid　
high…school…career…damaging　mistakes　that　might　embarrass　their　parents　or　the　school。　

With　its　beamed　ceiling；　mirrored　walls；　and　birchwood　modernist　tables　and　chairs；　the　
Constance　Billard　School　cafeteria　looked　more　like　a　hot　new　restaurant　than　an　institutional　
dining　room。　The　dingy　old　cafeteria　had　been　redone　last　summer　because　so　many　students　had　
been　going　out　for　lunch　or　bringing　their　own　that　the　school　had　been　losing　money　on　wasted　
food。　The　new　cafeteria　had　won　an　architectural　prize　for　its　appealing　design　and　high…tech　
kitchen；　and　it　was　now　the　students？　favorite　in…school　hangout；　despite　the　fact　that　Irene　and　her　
mean；　stingy；　grubby…fingernailed　old　cronies　were　still　the　ones　serving　the　food　from　the　
cafeteria？s　updated；　nouvelle　American　menu。　

Jenny　wove　her　way　through　the　clusters　of　girls　in　pleated　navy　blue；　gray；　or　maroon　wool　
uniform　skirts；　picking　at　their　wasabi…smoked　tuna　burgers　and　Red　Bliss　pommes　frites　and　
chatting　about　the　parties　they？d　been　to　this　past　weekend。　She　slid　her　stainless　steel　tray　onto　
the　empty　round　table　that　had　been　reserved　for　peer　group　A　and　sat　down　with　her　back　to　the　
mirrored　wall　so　she　wouldn？t　have　to　look　at　herself　while　she　ate。　She　couldn？t　wait　to　find　out　
who　her　senior　peer　group　leaders　were　going　to　be。　Supposedly　the　petition　had　been　fierce；　


since　being　a　leader　was　a　relatively　painless　way　of　showing　colleges　that　you　were　still　involved　
in　school　activities　even　though　your　applications　were　already　in。　It　was　like　getting　extra　credit　
for　eating　fries　and　talking　about　sex　for　fifty　minutes。　

Who　wouldn？t　want　to　do　that？　

？Hello；　Ginny。？　Blair　Waldorf；　the　bitchiest；　vainest　girl　in　the　entire　senior　class；　or　maybe　the　
entire　world；　slid　her　tray　into　the　place　across　from　Jenny　and　sat　down。　She　tucked　a　wavy　lock　
of　dark　brown　shoulder…length　hair　behind　her　ear　and　muttered　at　her　reflection　in　the　wall　of　
mirrors。　？I　can？t　wait　for　my　haircut。？　She　glanced　at　Jenny；　picked　up　her　fork；　and　raked　it　
through　the　dollop　of　whipped　cream　on　top　of　her　chocolate　angel　food　cake。　？I？m　one　of　the　
leaders　for　peer　group　A。　Areyou　in　group　A？？　

Jenny　nodded；　clutching　the　seat　of　her　chair　as　she　stared　gloomily　down　at　her　plate　of　cold；　
greasy　fries。　She　couldn？t　believe　her　bad　luck。　Not　only　was　Blair　Waldorf　the　most　intimidating　
senior　in　the　school；　she　was　also　Nate　Archibald？s　ex…girlfriend。　Blair　and　Nate　had　always　been　
the　perfect　couple；　the　ones　destined　to　stay　together　forever　and　ever。　Then；　strange　as　it　might　
have　seemed；　Nate　had　actually　dumped　Blair　for　Jenny　after　meeting　Jenny　in　the　park　and　
sharing　a　joint　with　her。　

It　had　been　Jenny？s　first　joint；　and　Nate　had　been　her　first　love。　She？d　never　dreamed　of　having　
an　older　boyfriend；　let　alone　one　as　gorgeous　and　cool　as　Nate。　But　after　a　couple　of　
too…good…to…be…true　months；　Nate　had　gotten　bored　with　Jenny　and　had　proceeded　to　break　her　
heart　in　the　cruelest　way　by　ditching　her　on　New　Year？s　Eve。　So　now　she　and　Blair　Waldorf　
actually　had　something　in　mon？they？d　both　been　dumped　by　the　same　boy。　Not　that　that　made　
any　difference。　Jenny　was　pretty　sure　that　Blair　still　hated　her　guts。　

Blair　knew　perfectly　well　that　Jenny　was　the　balloon…boobed　freshman　whore　who？d　stolen　her　
Natie　away；　but　she　also　knew　that　Nate　had　dumped　Jenny　flat　on　her　ass　after　some　extremely　
embarrassing　pictures　of　Jenny？s　bare　butt　in　a　thong　had　been　posted　on　the　Web　just　before　New　
Year？s　Eve。　Blair　figured　Jenny　had　already　gotten　her　euppance；　and　she　really　couldn？t　be　
bothered　with　hating　her　anymore。　

Jenny　looked　up。　？Who？s　your　coleader？？　she　asked　timidly。　She　wished　the　other　members　of　
the　group　would　hurry　up　and　get　there　before　Blair　tore　her　head　off　with　her　perfectly　manicured　
opalescent…pink　fingernails。　

？Serena？s　ing。？　Blair　rolled　her　eyes。　？You　know　her。　She？s　always　late。？　She　bed　her　
fingers　through　her　hair；　envisioning　the　cut　she　was　going　to　get　when　she　went　for　her　
appointment　during　double　free　period。　She　was　going　to　have　them　do　a　mahogany　rinse　to　get　
rid　of　the　copper…colored　highlights；　and　then　she　wanted　it　cut　short；　in　a　modern；　superstylish　
sort　of　way；　like　Audrey　Hepburn　inHow　to　Steal　a　Million　。　

？Oh；？　Jenny　replied；　relieved。　Serena　van　der　Woodsen　was　Blair？s　best　friend；　but　she　wasn？t　


nearly　as　intimidating；　because　she　was　actuallynice　。　

？Hi；　guys。　Is　this　peer　group　A？？　A　gangly；　freckled　freshman　girl　named　Elise　Wells　sat　down　
next　to　Jenny。　She　smelled　like　baby　powder；　and　her　strawlike　blond　hair　was　cut　in　a　chin…length　
bob　with　thick　bangs　masking　her　forehead；　exactly　like　the　haircut　Nanny　gave　you　when　you　
were　two。　？I？m　just　going　to　tell　you　now　that　I　have　a　problem　with　eating；？　Elise　announced。　？I　
can？t　eat　in　public。？　

Blair　nodded　and　pushed　her　slice　of　chocolate　cake　away　from　her。　In　peer　group　leader　training　
the　health　teacher；　Ms。　Doherty；　had　told　them　tolisten　and　try　to　besensitive　；　putting　themselves　
in　the　younger　girls？　shoes。　Ms。　Doherty　should　talk。　All　she　ever　talked　about　in　ninth…grade　
health　class　was　the　boyfriends　she？d　had　and　all　the　sexual　positions　she？d　tried。　Still；　Ms。　
Doherty　was　one　of　the　teachers　Blair　had　hit　up　for　an　extra　remendation　to　send　to　the　Yale　
admissions　office；　and　she　really　wanted　to　stand　out　as　the　best　peer　group　leader　in　the　senior　
class。　She　wanted　her　peer　group　freshmen　to　like　her？no；adore　her？and　if　one　of　them　had　a　
problem　with　eating　in　public；　Blair　wasn？t　going　to　sit　there　gorging　herself　on　chocolate　cake；　
especially　not　when　she？d　been　planning　to　throw　it　up　as　soon　as　the　bell　rang　anyway。　

Blair　pulled　a　pile　of　handouts　out　of　her　red　Louis　Vuitton　bowling　bag。　？Body　image　and　self　
esteem　are　two　of　the　issues　we？ll　be　discussing　today；？　she　told　Elise　and　Jenny；　trying　to　sound　
professional。　？If　my　coleader　and　the　rest　of　our　group　ever　decide　to　get　here；？　she　added　
impatiently。　Was　it　physically　possible　for　Serena　toever　be　on　time？

　Apparently　not。　

Just　then；　in　a　flurry　of　dove…gray　cashmere　and　shimmering　pale　blond　hair；　Serena　van　der　
Woodsen　slid　her　shapely；　tanned　butt　into　the　chair　next　to　Blair。　The　three　other　peer　group　A　
freshman　girls　were　trailing　her　like　baby　ducklings。　？Look　what　we　suckered　Irene　into　giving　us！？　
Serena　crowed；　slapping　a　heaping　plate　full　of　greasy　onion　rings　down　in　the　middle　of　the　
table。　？I　told　her　we　were　having　a　special　meeting　and　we　werestarving　。？　

Blair　glanced　sympathetically　at　Elise；　who　was　glowering　at　the　plate　of　onion　rings　with　
blond…lashed　blue　eyes　that　would　have　been　pretty　if　she？d　tried　using　a　little　dark　brown　Stila　
lengthening　mascara。　？You？re　late；？　Blair　accused；　passing　out　the　handouts　to　Serena　and　the　
other　three　freshmen。　？I？m　Blair；？　she　told　them。　？And　you　are　。　。　。　？？　

？Mary　Goldberg；　Vicky　Reinerson；　and　Cassie　Inwirth；？　the　three　girls　responded　in　unison。　

Elise　nudged　Jenny？s　elbow。　Mary；　Vicky；　and　Cassie　were　the　most　annoyingly　inseparable　
threesome　in　the　freshman　class。　They　were　always　brushing　each　other？s　hair　in　the　hallways；　and　
they　did　everything　together；　including　pee。　

Blair　glanced　down　at　the　handout　and　read　aloud；　？Body　image：　accepting　and　embracing　who　
you　are。？　She　looked　up　and　smiled　at　the　freshmen　expectantly。　？Do　any　of　you　have　a　particular　


body　image　issue　you？d　like　to　talk　about？？　

Jenny　felt　the　blood　creep　into　her　neck　and　face　as　she　boldly　considered　telling　them　about　the　
breast…reduction　consultation。　But　before　she　could　get　the　words　out；　Serena　crammed　an　
enormous　onion　ring　into　her　delicate　mouth　and　interjected；　？Can　I　just　say　something　first？？　

Blair　frowned　at　her　best　friend；　but　Mary；　Vicky；　and　Cassie　were　nodding　eagerly。　Listening　to　
anything　Serena　van　der　Woodsen　had　to　say　was　so　much　more　interesting　than　any　stupid　body　
image　discussion。　

Serena　plunked　her　elbows　down　on　top　of　the　handout　and　rested　her　perfectly　chiseled　chin　in　
her　manicured　hands；　her　enormous　dark　blue　eyes　gazing　dreamily　at　her　idyllic　reflection　in　the　
mirrored　wall。　？I？m　so　in　love；？　she　sighed。　

Blair　clutched　her　fork　and　dug　into　the　piece　of　chocolate　cake　again；　forgetting　about　her　
no…eating　solidarity　with　Elise。　Serena　was　so　goddamned　insensitive。　First　of　all；　the　guy　she　was　
apparently　？so　in　love？　with　happened　to　be　Blair？s　new　pseudohippie；　guitar…playing；　
dreadlocked　stepbrother；　Aaron　Rose；　which　was　justso　absurd　。　And　second　of　all；　even　though　
Nate　had　dumped　Blair　way　back　in　November；　Blair　wasstill　not　over　Nate；　and　the　mere　mention　
of　the　worldlove　made　her　want　to　blow　chunks。　？I　think　we？re　supposed　to　getthem　to　talk　
abouttheir　problems；　not　talk　aboutourselves　；？　she　hissed　at　Serena。　Of　course；　if　Serena　had　
actually　bothered　to　show　up　for　peer　group　training；　she　would　have　known　that　herself。　

Serena　had　blown　the　training　off　so　she　could　go　to　a　movie　with　Aaron；　and；　like　a　gullible　
idiot；　Blair　had　covered　for　her。　She？d　told　Ms。　Doherty　that　Serena　had　a　migraine　but　that　she　
would　personally　go　over　all　the　major　points　they　covered　in　training　when　Serena　felt　better。　It　
was　so　typical。　Whenever　Blair　did　anything　nice　for　someone　else；　she　usually　regretted　it。　

Which　kind　of　explained　why　she　was　such　a　bitch　most　of　the　time。　

Serena　shrugged　her　halter…top…perfect　shoulders。　？I　think　love　is　a　much　better　topic　than　body　
image　anyway。　I　mean；　we　all　talked　body　image　to　death　in　ninth…grade　health。？　She　glanced　at　
the　freshmen　seated　around　the　table。　？Right？？　

？I　just　think　we　should　follow　the　handout；？　Blair　insisted　stubbornly。　

？It？s　up　to　you　guys；？　Serena　told　the　younger　girls。　

Mary；　Vicky；　and　Cassie　waited；　ears　pricked；　for　the　scoop　on　Serena？s　love　life。　Elise　reached　
out　and　poked　a　greasy　onion　ring　with　a　trembling；　chewed…on　fingernail　and　then　snatched　her　
hand　away　again　as　if　she？d　been　burned。　Jenny　licked　her　winter…chapped　lips。　？Since　we？re　
supposed　to　talk　about　body　image；　I　guess　I　have　something　to　say；？　she　told　the　group；　her　voice　
wavering。　She　looked　up　to　find　Blair　nodding　and　smiling　at　her　encouragingly。　


　？Yes；　Ginny？？　

Jenny　looked　down　at　the　table　again。　Why　was　she　even　telling　them　this？Because　I　need　to　tell　
someone；　she　realized。　She　forced　herself　to　keep　talking　despite　the　furious　red…hot　blush　of　
embarrassment　burning　her　face。　？This　weekend　I　almost　had　a　consultation　for　a　breast　
reduction。？　

Mary；　Vicky；　and　Cassie　scooted　forward　in　their　chairs　to　listen。　Not　only　was　peer　group　going　
to　bethe　place　to　pick　up　the　latest　fashion　trends　from　the　two　coolest　girls　in　school；　it　was　going　
to　be　a　major　resource　for　gossip！　

？I　made　the　appointment；？　Jenny　continued；　？but　then　I　didn？t　go。？　She　pushed　her　plate　away　
and　took　a　sip　of　water；　trying　to　ignore　the　curious　stares　of　the　other　girls。　The　group　was　riveted；　
and　stealing　the　spotlight　from　Blair　and　Serena　was　no　easy　feat。　

Elise　picke