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世界上最动人的书信(常春藤英语书系)(全新中英文对照版)-第5部分
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陀思妥耶夫斯基致兄长米哈依尔(1)
费奥多尔·陀思妥耶夫斯基(1821—1881), 19世纪俄国伟大的小说家、思想家。在法国资产阶级革命思潮影响下,他早年曾醉心于空想社会主义,参加了彼得堡进步知识分子组织的彼得拉舍夫斯基小组的革命活动。1849年,陀思妥耶夫斯基被控阴谋叛国,判处死刑。临刑前一刻,收到沙皇的敕令,他被改判流放西伯利亚。这生与死之间的短短几秒给陀思妥耶夫斯基留下了不可磨灭的印象,之后他的作品一改往日风格,创作重点转向心理悲剧。他擅长心理剖析,尤其是揭示内心分裂,对人类肉体与精神痛苦的震撼人心的描写是其他作家无法企及的。他的矛盾性格组合、深层心理活动描写对后世作家产生了深远影响。
土街对面涅夫斯基广场涅士材德宅
米哈依尔·米哈依洛维奇·陀思妥耶夫斯基,
哥哥,我宝贵的朋友!事情都定下来了!我已经被宣判在要塞(我猜可能是奥伦斯基要塞)服四年苦役,然后去当列兵。今天,也就是12月22日,我们被押到了谢苗诺夫训练场。我们在那里听他们宣读了死刑判决书,又被要求亲吻了十字架,我们的宝剑在头顶上被折断,最后我们被换上了白衬衫。然后有三个人被绑缚在刑柱上等待行刑,我排在第六个。每次叫三个人,我在第二批,所以我离死亡最多只有一分钟了。
哥哥,我心里想起你和你的家人;在我临终前的那一刻,我心里想到的只有你,只有你一个人,那时候我才明白自己是多么地爱你啊,亲爱的哥哥!我还试着拥抱了站在我身旁的普列什耶夫和杜诺夫,并向他们说了再见。最后,忽然响起了撤退的号角,那些绑在行刑柱上的人被带了回来,然后,有人向我们宣布说沙皇陛下决定放我们一条生路,于是我们收到了现在的判决书。只有帕尔默被无罪释放了,回到军队里担任原来的职位。
亲爱的哥哥,我刚刚才被告知,我们今天或者明天就得出发。我提出想和你见一面,得到的回答是不可能,我能做的仅只是给你写这封信:请尽快回一封信给我吧。
我想你早已知道我们被判处了死刑。在被押往谢苗诺夫训练场的途中,我透过囚车的窗户看到很多围观的人群。也许你早已知晓了这消息,而且你一定很为我伤心。现在你看到了我的信,应该放下心了吧。
哥哥!我并没有垂头丧气或精神不振。生活无处不在,生活就在我们之间,而不在我们之外。永远有人在我周围,我要在人们中间做一个真正的“人”,要永远保持“人”的本色,无论面临什么样的不幸,我决不灰心,也决不倒下——生活就是这样的;生活的使命也是这样的。我已经意识到了这些,这种观念已经融入了我的血肉中。
……
请代我向大嫂和孩子们问好。为了让他们不要忘记我,请经常在他们面前提起我。我们将来还可能再见面呢!哥哥,请照顾好你自己和你的家人,希望你们平安而谨慎地生活下去,请多多考虑孩子们的前途……
……
哥哥,我们将来还可能有重逢之日!为了上帝的爱,请你一定要多多保重,好好活下去,直到我们再次相聚。将来总有一天我们还会紧紧拥抱,共同回想我们的青春时光、我们的黄金岁月、我们的理想希望,但此时此刻,我正把这一切从心中血淋淋地撕裂开来,并且把它们埋掉。
难道我将再也不能动手写作了吗?我想,四年之后,我很可能继续写作。我的上帝啊,如果我写了任何东西,我一定会把它们全都寄给你。啊!有多少存在于我脑海里的全新创作灵感将会凋谢,将会消失;或者;将作为一种毒素消融在我的血液里。是的,如果我不能写作的话,我一定会死掉的。最好是拿枝笔在监狱里待上十五年。。 最好的txt下载网
陀思妥耶夫斯基致兄长米哈依尔(2)
经常写信给我吧,要尽量写得详细些,要包括很多事实。不要忘了在每封信中都要写上家里所有的细节和琐事,这将带给我希望和活力。你可知道,在这个要塞里,你的来信有使我复活的力量!最近两个半月来,因为禁止写信和收信,我度过了一段非常难熬的时光……
……
如果我给任何人留有不好的记忆, 如果我同任何一个人争吵过,或者如果我给任何一个人造成了不愉快的印象,告诉他们忘掉这些吧——如果你能遇见他们的话。现在,我心里没有任何怨恨或者敌意,此时此刻,我应该拥抱我以前的每一位朋友,向他们表达深深的爱意。那是一种安慰,在今天临死之前; 向我亲爱的朋友说再见时,我亲自体验到了它……
……
当我回首过去,想到有那么多的时光已经白白荒废,有那么多的时间丧失在错觉、过失、懒散以及对于生活的无知中,那时我没有珍惜时间,也经常违背自己的心灵和精神——一想到这些,我的心就在流血。生命是一种恩赐,是一种幸福,我们每时每刻都应该生活在快乐之中。年轻人如果有经验该多好啊!现在,我的生命改变了,我获得了新生。哥哥!我向你发誓,我一定不会丧失希望,我一定保持精神与心灵的纯洁,我将获得一种更好的新生。那将是我全部的希望和所有的安慰!
狱中生活已经把我身上不够纯洁的物质欲望消灭殆尽。以前,我对自己不够注意,如今,艰难困苦对我已不算什么,因此,不要担心物质上的艰苦会把我折磨死。这是绝不可能的事!唉,要是我有健壮的体格就好了!
好,再见了,再见了,哥哥!让我紧紧地拥抱你,让我深情地亲吻你。请在心里记着我,不要伤心,不要悲痛。我恳求你,不要为我悲伤!在下一封信里,我将告诉你我是如何到那里去的。请记住我所告诉你的一切:计划好你的生活,不要浪费光阴,安排好你该做的一切,为你的孩子们作好打算。啊,我多想见你一面,多想见你一面!再见了!现在,我将哭着告别我所热爱的一切事物,离开它们是多么痛苦啊!把一个人一分为二、把一颗心剖为两半是多么痛苦啊!再见了!再见了!但我非常确信将会再次看到你——我希望你一直爱我,不要改变,不要让你的记忆冷却,回想你的爱将是我生命中最重要的一部分。再见了!再见了!再说一遍,向所有的一切告别!
你的弟弟,
费奥多·陀思妥耶夫斯基
1849年12月22日
于彼得与保罗要塞
Fyodor Dostoevsky
To
The Peter and Paul Fortress;
December 22; 1849
Mihail Mihaliovich Dostoevsky;
Nevsky Prospect; opposite Gryazny Street;in the house of Neslind
Brother; my precious friend! all is settled! I am sentenced to four years' hard labor in the fortress (I believe; of Orenburg); and after that to serve as a private。 Today; the 22nd of December; we were taken to the Semionov Drill Ground。 There the sentence of death was read to all of us; we were told to kiss the Cross; our swords were broken over our heads; and our last toilet was made (white shirts)。 Then three were tied to the pillar for execution。 I was the sixth。 Three at a time were called out; consequently; I was in the second batch and no more than a minute was left me to live。
I remembered you; brother; and all yours; during the last minute you; you alone; were in my mind; only then I realized how I love you; dear brother mine! I also managed to embrace Plescheyev and Durov who stood close to me; and to say goodby to them。 Finally the retreat was sounded; and those tied to the pillar were led back; and it was announced to us that His Imperial Majesty granted us our lives。 Then followed the present sentences。 Palm alone has been pardoned; and returns with his old rank to the army。 。 想看书来
陀思妥耶夫斯基致兄长米哈依尔(3)
I was just told; dear brother; that today or tomorrow we are to be sent off。 I asked to see you。 But I was told that this was impossible; I may only write you this letter: make haste and give me a reply as soon as you can。
I am afraid that you may somehow have got to know of our death sentence。 From the windows of the prison van; when we were taken to the Semionov Drill Ground; I saw a multitude of people; perhaps the news reached you; and you suffered for me。 Now you will be easier on my account。
Brother! I have not bee downhearted or lowspirited。 Life is everywhere ; life in ourselves; not in what is outside us。 There will be people near me; and to be a man among people and remain a man forever; not to be downhearted nor to fall in whatever misfortunes may befall me—this is life; this is the task of life。 I have realized this。 This idea has entered into my flesh and into my blood。
…
Kiss your wife and children。 Remind them of me continually; see that they do not forget me。 Perhaps; we shall yet meet some time! Brother; take care of yourself and of your family; live quietly and carefully。 Think of the future of your children…
…
And maybe; we shall meet again some time; brother! Take care of yourself; go on living; for the love of God; until we meet。 Perhaps some time we shall embrace each other and recall our youth; our golden time that was; our youth and our hopes; which at this very instant I am tearing out from my heart with my blood; to bury them。
Can it indeed be that I shall never take a pen into my hands? I think that after the four years there may be a possibility。 I shall send you everything that I may write; if I write anything; my God! How many imaginations; lived through by me; created by me anew; will perish; will be extinguished in my brain or will be spilt as poison in my blood! Yes; if I am not allowed to write; I shall perish。 Better fifteen years of prison with a pen in my hands!
Write to me more often; write more details,more; more facts。 In every letter write about all kinds of family details; of trifles; don't forget。 This will give me hope and life。 If you knew how your letters revived me here in the fortress! These last two months and a half; when it was forbidden to write or receive a letter; have been very hard on me …
If anyone has bad memories of me; if I have quarreled with anyone; if I have created in anyone an unpleasant impression— tell them they should forget it; if you manage to meet them。 There is no gall or spite in my soul; I should dearly love to embrace any one of my former friends at this moment。 It is a fort; I experienced it today when saying goodby to my dear ones before death …
…
When I look back at the past and think how much time has been wasted in vain; how much time was lost in delusions; in errors; in idleness; in ignorance of how to live; how I did not value time; how often I sinned against my heart and spirit—my heart bleeds。 Life is a gift; life is happiness; each minute might have been an age of happiness。 Si jeunesse svait! Now; changing my life; I am being reborn into a new form。 Brother! I swear to you that I shall not lose hope and shall preserve my spirit and heart in purity。 I shall be reborn to a better thing。 That is my whole hope; my whole fort!
The life in prison has already sufficiently killed in me the demands of the flesh which were not wholly pure; I took little heed of myself before。 Now privations are nothing to me; and; therefore; do not fear that any material hardship will kill me。 This cannot be! Ah! To have health!
Well; goodby; goodby; brother! I embrace you closely; I kiss you closely。 Remember me without pain in your heart。 Do not grieve; I pray you; do not grieve for me! In the next letter I shall tell you of how I go on。 Remember then what I have told you: plan out your life; do not waste it; arrange your destiny; think of your children。 Oh; to see you; to see you! Goodby! Now I tear myself away from everything that was dear; it is painful to leave it! It is painful to break oneself in two; to cat the heart in two。 Goodby! Goodby! But I shall see you; I am convinced—I hope; do not change; love me; do not let your memory grow cold; and the thought of your love will be the best part of my life。 Goodby; goodby; once more! Goodby to all!
Your brother
Fyodor Dostoevaky
。。
狄更斯致妻子
查尔斯·狄更斯(1812-1870),19世纪英国著名的小说家;出生于英国朴茨茅斯特地区的一个小职员家庭。12岁时;父亲负债入狱,他被迫辍学做工,后来经济条件有所改善,才得以复学。狄更斯16岁便到一家律师事务所当缮写员,后又担任报社采访记者,广泛接触社会,因此他了解底层生活,也了解上层社会的种种罪恶,熟悉司法界和议会政治中的诸多弊端;并为他后来的批判现实主义文学创作奠定了思想基础。1837年,他发表第一部长篇小说《匹克威克外传》,获得巨大成功。从此,他专门从事文学创作,在此30年间,他一共写了14部长篇小说(其中有一部未完成)及许多中短篇小说、戏剧、杂文和游记等。他的作品以人道主义精神为本源,描写下层劳动人民的悲惨遭遇,揭露封建贵族和资产阶级贪婪、伪善、狡诈、腐朽的生活习性。其代表作主要有《奥列佛·特维斯特》和《大卫·科波菲尔》等。
狄更斯39岁那年,他的小女儿朵拉(Dora)不幸病逝。他写此信,将这个不幸的消息告知妻子。
我最亲爱的凯特——现在你要留心,你必须慢慢地、非常仔细地读这封信。如果你是匆忙之中读到这里,尚不十分明白(还没有领悟出有什么坏消息)的话,我希望你从头再读一遍。
小朵拉没有感觉到一点痛苦就突然病倒了。她的脸色非常平静——如果你看见她安详的表情,你会误以为她正在平静地睡觉呢。但我知道她病得不轻,而且我也不敢对她的康复抱太大的希望。我不相信(亲爱的,我为什么要对你说假话呢?),我根本不相信她甚至还有复原的可能。
我不想离家外出,虽然我留在这里也帮不了什么忙,但我还是觉得留在这儿的选择是正确的。我知道你也不愿意离家在外,你不在家的时候我总是心怀不安。福斯特还是像往常一样那么关心我们,他现在给你送去这封信并接你回家。然而,我在结束这封信之前还必须坚决地要求和严厉地命令你,回家时一定要保持镇静沉着——
要记住我平时对你说过的话:我们的孩子多,别的父母所遭受到的不幸,我们根本不能指望得到幸免。如果——如果你回来的时候,我不得不忍住悲痛对你说“我们的小宝宝死了”,你仍然要对其他孩子尽到做母亲的责任,要向他们证明你值得他们对你充分地信赖。
如果你看完这封�
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